Every time Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago opens her mouth, all ears are anticipating for a quotable line. She does not only come up substantial speeches but she also adds humor. She seriously can be a stand-up comedian if ever she decides to retire from politics. Here are some of her famous tagalog pick-up lines.

“Kung magkakaroon ako ng sariling planeta, gusto ko ikaw ang axis nito, para sayo lang iikot ang mundo ko.”

“Sana FB status ka na lang, para pwede kitang i-like.”

“Ibenta mo na bahay mo, total nandito ka na, nakatira sa puso ko.”

“Sana naka-off ang ilaw, para tayo na lang mag-on.”

“Noodles ka ba, kasi Lucky Me?” “Para see-saw, pag wala ka, down ako.”

“Para kang hold-upper, lahat ibibigay ko sayo, wag mo lang akong saktan.”

“Galing mo din, ano? Di mo pa ako binabato tinamaan mo na ako.”

“Maglaro tayo ng kahit ano, wag lang taguan, kasi a girl like you is hard to find.”

“Sana exam mo na lang ako, para sagutin mo rin ako.”

“Bastos ka rin, ano? Di ka man lang nagpapaalam tuloy-tuloy kang pumasok sa puso ko.”

“Google ka ba? Lahat kasi ng hinahanap ko sayo ko natagpuan.”

“Nakalimutan ko pangalan mo, eh. Pwede bang tawagin na lang kitang akin?”

“Nakalunok ka ba ng kwitis, kasi pag ngumiti ka, may spark.”

“Sana ikaw ang cardiologist ko, para ikaw ang mag-aalaga sa puso ko.”

“Sana scientist ako, para ikaw naman ang lab ko.”

“Tindera ka ba ng yosi? Kasi you give me Hope… and More.”

“Para kang cactus, kasi handa akong masaktan, mayakap ka lang.”

“Pag wala ka ang buhay ko parang lapis na hindi natasahan, pointless.”

Q:Paano mo sasabihin sa isang babae na mataba siya na hindi siya mababastos?

A: Excuse me, Miss Mang Tomas ba ang lotion mo?

Guy 1: May sagot ka ba sa exam?

Guy 2: Puro blanko.

Guy 1: Patay.

Guy 2: Bakit?

Guy 1: Baka isipin nila nagkopyahan tayo.

Girl: Saan tayo magde-date sa Valentines?

Boy: Sa sementeryo

Girl: Bakit dun?

Boy: Para mapatunayan kong patay na patay ako sa ‘yo.

Q: Pedicab ka ba?

A: Pedicabang i-date sa Valentine’s Day?

“Ang love, parang bayad sa jeep. Minsan, hindi nasusuklian.”

“Tatakbo ka ba sa eleksyon? Boto kasi sayo magulang ko.”

“Sana magkasama tayo sa pila para kapag may sumigaw ng “Next!” tatanungin mo na ako ng, “Tayo na ba?”

“Pangalan mo pa lang kinikilig na ako, paano pa kaya kung magkaapelyido na tayo?”

“Ang pag-ibig ay parang ketchup, matamis pero maraming nakikisawsaw.”

“Ano’ng height mo? Paano ka nagkasya sa puso ko?”

“Masasabi mo bang bobo ako kung ikaw lang naman ang lamang ng utak ko?”

“Pwede bang magpa-blood test? Para malaman mo na type kita.”

You know guys, I have never been a playboy, I can definitely say that it’s hard for me to approach a girl especially out of nowhere; I do not have the boyish charms of Brad Pitt or the body of a male model (but I am skinny like Kate Moss), I’m just an average Joe. And it is kind of, shall we say frustrating? Irritating? Emasculating…Well, whatever it is, it’s really not fun being on the suave guy’s shadow all the time and there you are, doing your own thing in the background and asking God: “Who am I? Why am I alone?”

You probably don’t do that but it would be fascinating if you do. So, have you ever tried doing something about it? You know… anything that would make you stand out and be remembered by that broody chick with the dark eyeliner?  Solution: Pinoy  pick up lines for guys to be used for girls.

Pwede ka mahulog sa building, pwede ka mahulog sa puno…
Pero ang pinakamaganda ay..kung sa akin ka na lang mahuhulog…

May band-aid ka miss? Nahulog kasi ako eh…
Nahulog ako sayo.

Miss Miss! Mali ka ng pinuntahan!
Doon ang Ms. Universe Contest Hindi dito…

Interior designer ka ba?
Gumanda kasi yung kwarto pag dating mo eh.

Parang bali na lapis ang buhay ko pag wala ka…pointless…

Ano pangalan mo? Magpapasko na kasi para alam ko ano hihilingin ko sa pasko.

Aray miss! (bakit?) nakakapaso ka you’re so hot!

Miss kausap mo ba ko? (hindi bakit?), ok pwede mo ng simulan, Go.

Alam mo? Tingin ko sweet ka na tao…patikim nga!

Kung walang pinapatunguhan buhay mo, ituturo ko na lang ang daan patungong puso ko…

Sabi ni Peter Pan “You will fly when thinking of happy thoughts”, Eh bat nahuhulog ako pag iniisip kita?

Pag laki ko…gusto ko maging….SAYO.

It may not be the solution you expected to hear, but like I said, I’m no Casanova. But do you know what I have? A little bit of sense of humor. So who cares if you are not the knight in shining armor a girl expects to encounter, when all a girl wants is a man who can make her smile each day.

Are you feeling lonely? Is the weight of the world on your shoulders again? Do you feel like everything you do is wrong and nothing seems right? You talked to your friend, yet he didn’t believe you. Well, your desperation is about to end as emo tagalog love quotes help you cope up with your anxieties by showing that such problems aren’t yours alone, they are others too.

Emotions vary from time to time. Today you’re happy, later you’re not. Right now, the one you love the most or the gadget you yearn for so strongly is not yours, yet, because maybe, later, time will come, it’ll be in your hands. Likewise, if you’re feeling so depressed, rejected and alone right now, that will not last long for sure, no matter how big your traps are. Just sit back, enjoy what you feel, learn from it and read some emo tagalog love quotes.

However, if you are not the person I described earlier and you know somebody who is under that situation, well, share the word, share these emo tagalog love quotes.

“Huwag mong bitawan ang bagay na hindi mo kayang makitang hawak ng iba.”

Majority take this line as for love life only, however, reading the context deeper, you’ll see that this can be applied in most situation you are in. For an instance, you used to be the top student or the “crush ng bayan” yet, one time, you got tired and eventually stopped. Surprisingly, when somebody took your throne, you became irritated and everything, for short became “jealous and insecured”. Hence, if you have something, take care of it, if you want to give it away, think twice. This is the same in terms of friendship, possession, roles and more.

“Nalaman kong habang lumalaki ka, maraming beses kang madadapa. Bumangon ka man ulit o hindi, magpapatuloy ang buhay, iikot ang mundo, at mauubos ang oras.”

Wake up! Are you still breathing? Don’t just sit down there and do nothing, continue life, it’s a race, come on! Run my friend, you can still cope up. Don’t let everyone leave you alone, don’t live life like a loser!

Yes, indeed, a lot of people nowadays stopped growing when they once failed. They didn’t continue life and lived like mere zombies but eventually realized the right one, but time is already scarce for them; too late.  As for us, the king and queen of our life, let’s live it to the fullest.

“Mas magandang mapalungkot mo ang isang tao dahil sa sinabi mo sa kanya ang totoo, kesa mapaiyak siya kasi nalaman pa niya ito sa ibang tao”.

Well, the fact is, secrets, as they call it, will be revealed in its due time, whether you like it or not. So, don’t try to hide your failing grades to your parents, or  the person you’ve been making out with for a month to your girl/boyfriend, or your real gender orientation, straight or just pretending to be? Prolonging the secrecy isn’t giving you the sense of security anyway, it extends the guilt and condemnation, as this emo tagalog quotes imply. Just tell it, bear the consequences, and… POOF! it’s done!

“Masakit maging kaibigan ang taong mahal mo. di mo alam kung saan ka dapat lumugar. Bawal mainis at lalong bawal umasa. Bakit? Ano ba karapatan mo? Kaibigan ka lang di ba?”

Well said. Exactly, straight to the point. It is a sad truth that some people irresistibly fall in love with their friends, where friends should be just friends and not lovers. However, look at this angle, what if with that love you’re keeping, he’s feeling the same, waiting for the right time?  “They say that “action speaks louder than words”, kaya lang puro ka lang paramdam. Malay ko ba kung may pagtingin ka sa akin. Ayoko namang umasa. Tanong ko lang, mahirap bang sabihing “mahal kita?”

Taking chances my dear, is without question an emotion stirrer. It will either break or make what you are trying to attain. So what now? The action lies in your hands.

“Sana ang pag-ibig parang sukli sa jeep. Kahit ipasa pasa ka pa sa maraming tao, kukunin at kukunin ka pa rin ng tunay na nagmamayari sayo”.

This is for those who believe in “destiny”, yet failed to find it. That’s why they tried to look for it in their own terms, came to nothing, so returned in waiting and dreaming that “destiny” exists. One equivalent emo tagalog quotes in terms for friendship is, “Marami na akong nakilala, sabi nila ‘walang iwanan’. Pero dumating yung panahon na may umalis at may naiwan, kaya naisip ko, ikaw kaya, hanggang kailan?”

Well, let me end this article about emo tagalog quotes with another quotation, “From a college professor: ‘Lahat kayo papasa, di nga lang sabay sabay”. Humorous for some second, and the next, it will make you think and reflect. Well, in school and in life, this quotation is applicable. It is given that all of us will pass, undoubtedly, however, the answer of “when will it happen” depends on our willingness to desire for it and to put it into action.

Furthermore, we should not reside in our negative emotions and circumstances. Find something that will change your mood, it’s worth the risk. Where anyway, you really should do it. Most especially, never forget that whenever you’re in a state of loneliness, emo tagalog quotes are just some clicks away.

Alone, depressed and broken, then all of the sudden the emotion was stirred up by the tagalog quotes for broken hearted that appeared on your wall.

“Sabi mo gusto mo ‘ko, sabi mo konting panahon na lang magkakasama na tayo, sabi mo iiwan mo na siya, sabi mo hintayin kita, sabi mo mas mahal mo ako, ngayon asan ka na? Bakit kapiling ka pa rin nya?”

The quotation reminded you about the past memories you had together, you tried not to relate yourself, but every single line made you reminisce the love you shared with each other. Inevitably, your head shook in regret ; sorrow filled the atmosphere and  right then and there, your tears began to flow.

Indeed, tagalog broken heart quotes add insults to injury, yet they clear up the things you were once blinded about and give you the sense of comfort as they sympathize with you.

Being broken hearted, a.k.a “BH”, is the state of an emotional disappointment brought about by the failure to meet the cravings of one’s heart. These cravings can be of family, academics and love. The latter is the most common reason why people are experiencing such. Certainly, this feeling is natural, for as all we know, to love is normal.

Some Filipinos, in the face of being broken hearted, are into wild things such as drinking, fighting and worst, committing suicide. Some are diverting the pain through having fun with friends, singing some songs about his or her situation and composing or reading some tagalog broken heart quotes.

Let me give you some more example of tagalog broken heart quotes that will surely either intensify your emotion or ease it by knowing that such situation is being shared by many.

“Kadalasan nakakatakot magmahal kasi masakit umasa; pero hindi ba mas masakit yung alam mo na ngang wala kang pagasa, pero siya pa mismo ang nagpaparamdam na sa kanya ika’y mahalaga”

Experiencing confusion towards somebody who seems to like “you” yet in reality, they don’t, is tragic. Thoughts like “Is he/she just flirting with me? or just his/her personality or… does he/she love me? Someone being sweet and nice to you is somewhat deceiving, especially when you feel something different about him/her. Even though he/she knows that you have something for him/her, still he/she entertains you. Then you’ll fall for his/her acts of kindness and keep it and bear the pain forever, for you know that you are not for each other.

“Kahit ilang beses pa akong masaktan dahil sayo, di ako susuko. Kahit magkaroon pa ng isangdaang dahilan upang ika’y iwan, hahanap parin ako ng isang dahilan para pagmamahal ko sayo’y ipaglaban.”

“Martyrs”, as they call it, are those who are willing to give everything they have because of love. They are selfless to the extent that all the love in their system has been offered to the person they love. In the end, they thought that they’re saving their relationship, then unnoticed, they just destroyed it. Likewise, this  tagalog broken heart quotes shares the same idea. “Pumayag akong mawala ka, hinayaan kong ako’y masaktan, ayos lang na ako’y lumuha. Kahit na ako’y napipilitan lamang, aking ibibigay lahat para sa iyong kagustuhan at kaligayahan.”Too much love will indeed kill you! Hence, don’t forget to save something for yourself.

“Masakit kapag ang taong mahal mo, ay masaya sa piling ng iba pero kailangan mong ipakita na masaya ka, kahit na sa loob mo ‘sana, ako na lang siya’.

This is similar to the song “Alumni Homecoming” of Parokya ni Edgar that tells about the love that was kept until all the chances of expressing it were gone. It ended up with disappointment knowing that he could be the person the girl is with if only he took the courage. A lot of person nowadays are in the same boat as this person, afraid to take the step, ended up losing the person they love the most and live up in the proposition that they could have been the person beside their love one.

“Oo, nagseselos ako, kahit na sabihin mong magkaibigan lang kayo at ako ang mahal mo. Natatakot ako na isang araw iwan mo ako, dahil noong una “magkaibigan” lang din naman tayo.”

In terms of friendship, the start of everything, the stepping stone of every mountain, the starting line of every race, everything is possible. That is why such suspicions are inevitable in a relationship. However, this still depends on how loyal you are with each other, as this another tagalog broken heart quotes implies: “Lumapit ako sayo sa pagiisip na iyong mapapansin, di ko inakala na sa aking paglapit ako’y lalong luluha, dahil pinaramdam mo sa akin na siya lang ang kaya mong mahalin, at tayo’y hamak lamang na mag-tropa.” See? Not every friendship turns into lovers, however, some still do.

“Tama na yung minsan mo kong paasahin, minsang saktan at minsang paluhain. Minsan mo lang naman din akong minahal; hindi tulad ko, minahal kita ng walang katapusan”

This is the cry of those who have given everything, yet, received nothing in return. Life is indeed unfair, but love is more drastic. Those who give more are always left in tears while the other tend to be callous of giving back. In a relationship, being mutual and conjugal are very essential ingredients. Without these, well, think again.

“Let’s break up! This is not working!”, “I like you, but I love him”, “You are okay, but not of my type.” Are you tired of hearing these words every time you are in love with somebody or committed in a relationship?  Sick of being broken hearted as if true love has always ignored you since the day of your creation? Do you need a friend who will relate with you in times like this? Well, the confidence is not in person, for they will fail you, but instead, it’s in the tagalog broken heart quotes.

Hey! Are you feeling down right now? Do problems bother your head again? Are you tired of living life anymore? Well, try some inspirational tagalog quotes.  Let me tell you, it’ll make up your day!

Every individual needs something to motivate them to move on. Sometimes, yes, the feeling of being down to earth, (i’m not referring about being humble but the literal one) where all you want to do is to eat the mud and die and live again like plants where worries and problems are not being experienced, occurs once in a while. Depression and losing are inevitable in our life’s journey and they depletes the spirit of courage and power.

Well, reading some inspirational tagalog quotes will maybe recharge again the greatness in you as you realize that there are always chances in every battle. So, here, let me give some energizers!

”Ang negatibong tao ay nakakakita ng problema sa bawat pagkakataon. Ang positibong tao ay nakikita ang pagkakataon sa bawat problema.”

HOORRRAAAYY!!! This is unquestionably true. In a war field, being an optimist or a pessimist is a great determining factor of who will be the winner. Hence, those who are always thinking positively, guess what? they always bring the bacon home! Here’s another inspirational tagalog quote that may strengthen my point, “May mga panahong ang pagkakataon ay nagkukubli sa pansamantalang kabiguan.” Blessings in disguise indeed, just always be in a state of positivity, see things as opportunity and defeats as gifts, through that, i doubt that you’ll ever experience the feeling of losing.

”Ang mga taong agad sumusuko ay hindi nananalo. Ang mga taong laging panalo ay hindi kailan man sumusuko.”

One sad truth is that when people experience failure, some of them give up and never continue. Well, that’s the origin of being a “loser”. Being a loser isn’t just about losing, it’s about giving up. Michael Jordan, George Washington, KFC and even Charice Pempengco are those who lost several times, well, yeah, look at them now, people of history and media. How did it happen? They didn’t give up, they never did. So, why would you? Similar to this is another inspirational tagalog quote that will give you the ingredient of how to be victorious, “Ang tunay na sikreto sa tagumpay ay pagsisikap at patuloy na pagbangon sa bawat pagkakamali.” Alright, so now, let’s remove the words “ I GIVE UP” in our dictionary and live with a winning attitude.

”Wag mo hayaang sumasabay ka lang sa agos ng dagat, minsan, dapat ikaw mismo ang kokontrol ng direksyon nito.”

Don’t just go with the flow, sometimes, you have to go against it! In life, crisis, recession and even sickness is the flow of water. Well, in that case, you can’t go with it, you must go against it. Fight these waters that drown every individual, don’t be one of them. People may talk bad about you, or confess that you cannot reach your dreams, but naah, prove them wrong buddy! You know yourself more than they know you. Live life not conforming with everything, instead stand out, be proud and shine! 

“Kung lahat ng makakaya mo ay iyong ibinibigay, tagumpay mo’y walang kapantay”

Nothing can defeat a person who gives his/her best in everything he/she does. In simple tasks, he/she does not procrastinate instead gives his/her whole heart in it. Just as the saying goes, “if you are trusted in small things, you will be entrusted with bigger ones”. So, as an individual, applying this inspirational tagalog quote will surely bring difference in our daily lives as a student or even as a worker. Well, some of our leisure time will be consumed but the satisfaction it will return will be beyond what we are asking for. So, even with just doing an assignment or serving a coffee, one must be keen and careful to bring out our best into it. Who knows, they are just some preparation for your great destiny!

“Hindi mahalaga kung gaano ka katagal nabuhay, ang mahalaga ay kung paano ka nabuhay.”

A lot of people lived and died as if they never existed. Question, do you wanna be one them? Well, I doubt. All of us want to be remembered when we die, even if you don’t agree with me, I know, deep inside your subconscious mind you do. It’s our nature buddy to want recognition.  Well, just always keep in mind that in life, what we’ve done when we still have the chance matters most. Some people only realize that when they are old and wrinkled already, when they no longer have the capacity to make a difference anymore. Come on! You know you can do something. Well, we all can. We just have to stretch our limbs and be willing to do so.

Well, the fact there are traps in life is already given, what is not yet there is the way on how we’ll react to it. It’s not wrong to fall down because of troubles and issues that attacked us, what is wrong is when we refuse to stand up and box ourselves because of this one time event. Always be motivated and always read some inspirational tagalog quotes to empower you.           

If you are not the person I am referring above, and you know somebody else who needs this the most, don’t hesitate to share this, share some inspirational tagalog quotes to them. Once you applied this in your own life and discovered something more, remember to compose your own and to spread it. You’ll never know how many people you are going to inspire. Cheers!

When it comes to humor, us Filipinos have plenty of that! Maybe it is deep within our genetic structure and culture to find humor in almost anything we can think of. We have the Filipino’s light-heartedness to thank for that; the ability to keep things light in spite of stress and calamities, we are always ready to laugh.

We are so used to many types of jokes; we can easily encounter a satirical joke in news papers. We are very fond of ethnic stereotyping jokes which sometimes deal on racism. We have self deprecating ones and lots of naughty ones! There are so many situations and incidents that we can easily transform as comedy. One of the most popular types of humor that simply refuses to die out is the Pick Up Line joke. Here we dwell on romance, cheesiness, naughtiness and word play at the same time.

Here are some funny tagalog pick up lines for 2013.

Ano pangalan mo miss? Inaayos ko kasi yung “To Do” list for 2012 ko eh.

Tingin ko delivery woman ka…kanina mo pa tinitingnan “package” ko eh.

May nagsabi sa akin andito daw ang hinahanap ko na treasure chest! Pero nung nakita kita, ok na ko sa chest lang…

Kamusta naman ang langit nang naglayas ka?

Kelangan ko tingnan cell number mo, baka ninakaw mo yung akin eh nawawala kasi.

Lumapit ako ng may naka-ready na pick-up line, sa ganda mo nakalimutan ko tuloy.

My twitter ka? Kaya lang hindi pala sapat ang 140 characters para itweet sa mundo kung gaano ka kaganda.

Pwede mo ba ko samahan sa pari para magkumpisal? (sure! Why what did you do?)…Ah…eh… gagawin pa lang natin…

Wag ka mag-alala miss andito lang ako at nagbabantay! Hindi ako aalis sa tabi mo! Mabuti nang sigurado baka lumapit ang mga babaero eh…

Ah…ganon may boyfriend ka?… Alam mo mas ok lagi kung may back up ka, just in case diba. (kindat)

Curious lang, trabaho mo ba maging sexy o hobby lang?

Girl: Sorry di ako namimigay ng number sa guys eh…
Boy: Ah ganon ba? Ako din hindi nagbibigay ng number sa guys eh! We have so much in common!

Boy: Ganda ng hugis ng katawan mo, parang bote ng Coca-Cola.
Chubby Girl : Talaga?
Boy: Oo, Coca-Cola talaga. Family size Coca-Cola !

It seems that no matter how we evolve, how we progress to more technological advances, we have this nice talent with puns and word play, as long as it has something to do with getting to know another person. Maybe we are making it humorous to stabilize our nervousness, who knows? All I know is… I need a good laugh once in awhile!

Is it true that: “All works and no humor makes Johnny a dull boy”?  Take time out from your serious works or pause your busy working mind to read just for fun.

Here are the newest and latest  Pinoy Jokes 2012.

BEGGAR : Please give alms to poor me, can I have a piece of cake ?
BAKERY Owner : A choosy beggar, here, a pan de-sal . Gusto mo pa cake ha?
BEGGAR : I would prefer cake because its my birthday today.

SON : Dad, take care, they sometimes go wayward. Beware of those DUMB TRUCKS…!
Daddy : Son, What do you mean, dumb trucks?
SON : Dad, those that carry large, heavy  cargoes, with ten wheels…!
DADDY : Son, Those are not dumb truck, you call them …TEN MILLER.

BOY : Lahat ng ginagawa ko mali, I am not a good son to you, hindi nyo ako mahal …!!
FATHER : Anak, Nagkakamali ka doon..!
BOY : Oh tamo na ! Mali na naman ako!!!

NANAY : Naku itong anak ko, Ang lakas mo kumain pero di mautusan…!
ANAK : Kapag yung alagang baboy natin malakas kumain, natutuwa kayo, Sino ba talaga ang anak nyo?

BOYFRIEND : May ibibigay akong gift sa iyo, pero hulaan mo!
GIRLFRIEND : Sige, clue naman…
BOYFRIEND : Kailangan ito ng leeg mo…
GIRLFFRIEND : Kwintas?
BOYFRIEND : Hindi, …Panghilod ! !

JUDGE : Ano ba talaga nangyari ha?
NASASAKDAL : (Hindi nagsasalita’)
JUDGE ; Sumagot ka na sa tanong…
NASASAKDAL : Naku! Akala ko eh hearing lang to. Bakit may speaking ?

FROG : Oh my fairy, …What does my future hold?
FAIRY : You’ll meet someone who wants to know you, …everything about you.
FROG : Yeah, …Great! …Will I meet her in a party?
FAIRY : No, …in Biology class.

NANAY : Mga anak, alam ba ninyo na bawa’t butil ng palay ay nagmula sa pagod at pawis ng mga magsasaka?
MGA BATA’ : eeeewwwwww! ! !

DUKTOR : Umubo ka!
PEDRO : Ubho! Ubho! Ubho!
DUKTOR : Ubo pa!
PEDRO : Ubho! Ubho! Ubho!
DUKTOR : Okay….
PEDRO : Ano po sakit ko doc ?
DUKTOR : . . .Ubo, . . .May ubo ka….

NANAY : Ang Ten Commandments ay ang sampung utos ng Diyos…
ANAK : Mas makapangyarihan po’ pala kayo kesa sa Diyos, nay !
NANAY : Bakit naman anak?
ANAK : Mas marami po’ kayong utos sa akin eh….

PEDRO Batumbakal : Ako, natapos ko ay education, ang tawag sa akin ay SIR Batumbakal…
TEOFILO Calma : Ako ay abogasya, ang tawag sa akin ay ATTORNEY Calma…
PAMFILO Dokturan : ako, nakatapos ng medicine, ang tawag sa akin ay DOCTOR Dokturan…

MEKANIKO : Sir, hindi ko po’ naayos ang preno ng kotse eh…
CUSTOMER : Ha?! Paano iyan?
MEKANIKO : Nilakasan ko na lang po’ ang busina! Happy trip na lang po’!

BOY : Tulungan nyo naman ako sa homework ko, …Find the least common denominator.
DAD : Ha? Aba’y grade three pa lang ako eh hinahanap na yan ah! Aba’y di pa ba nila nakikita?

Anong sinasabi ng alupihan nang makasalubong niya ang isa pang centipede ?
Uy brother! …Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! Apir! … …

TITSER : Bakit late ka Edong ?
EDONG : Nahulog ho kasi yung 500 peso bill nung mama’…
TITSER : At tinulungan mong maghanap ?
EDONG : Hindi po’…Tinapakan ko lang po’ hanggang umalis siya, …kaya po ako late.

Two liners…

Today’s Inspiring quote….

“Hindi ako tamad, hindi ko lang alam kung saan ibubuhos kasipagan ko.”

If the Darwinian theory of evolution is true, …that, man evolved from apes, why are there people na mukhang kabayo…

Hindi ba dahilan ng pagbaha’ sa panahon ni Noah ay pinutol niya ang mga puno’ para gumawa’ ng pagkalaki-laking  arko? Ano kaya’ sa tingin nyo?

What is the longest sentence ?     . . .What ?
Life sentence . . .   (imprisonment)

KNOWLEDGE, is knowing that a tomato is a fruit…
WISDOM, is not putting it in your fruit salad.

Remember that life is but a dream.  Laughter is the best medicine. ‘Di na kailangan ang reseta at doctor’s consultation fee.  It’s FREE ! Laugh a lot and be healthy.

More tagalog jokes here.

Try also stories about Bobarina , the war freak girl.

Do you want to say something special to the one you love the most? Something that will sound really passionate and be worth treasuring forever? Expressions that are beyond the words “I Love You” without sounding absurd? Or, do you want to just play around and hook as many people as you can?  Well, the magic is all in the tongue, yes, it’s all in the sweet tagalog love quotes.

Contrary to the todays trending “pick-up line” a.k.a “banat”, sweet tagalog love quotes express their wonders through some more intense and sugarcoated compositions that will deconstruct the common saying, “No words can express how much I love you”. Such is being supported and used by those who wanted to convey one’s emotion in a very direct and serious heartwarming way.

Now, from a Filipino’s general view, life would be incomplete without these so-called “ sweet tagalog love quotes ” roaring on the streets, ringing around the places and revolving in the atmosphere. Every now and then, there come cliches of sweet words from people which give the aroma of how “the love is in the air” feels like.  This also becomes a unique style for them for so many years to beget the heart of their “iniirog o sinisinta”, through the use of different sweet flowery words. For this reason, it becomes now a tradition of many Filipinos, particularly the masculine generations of this modern era or to say, the boys. Likewise, it becomes a form of fun, to make people laugh (if they find it “corny”) or to some purpose, be loved by these simple but sweet tagalog love quotes.

Long before this modern generation, sweet love quotes are already being circulated by individuals to convey their feelings for each other. In fact, this can be considered “legendary” since it has been used ages ago, back from Jose Rizal and even from Plato. Hence, its effectivity is determined, success is historically time-tested.

Here are some sweet tagalog love quotes that will surely construct an atmosphere of sweetness and affectionately move the person who’ll hear this.

“Naniniwala ako na tadhana ang dahilan kung bakit magkasama tayo, ngunit kung ididikta nito ang ating paghihiwalay, mabubuhay ako ng walang pinaniniwalaan, wag ka lang sakin mawalay”

Yes, truly, love conquers all, even the things unseen and beyond our control. This can be seen in a positive side that you are ready and eager to take anything just to have him or her remain by your side; however, this obsession may further lead to something horrible, as most seen in the movies. Still, we can’t abstain from the fact that this quote will make one giggle so much, knowing that you will fight anything just to preserve your love for him or her.

“Masakit magmahal, nangako ako na hindi na ito mauulit kahit kailan, pero, noong ika’y nakita’t nakilala, paninindigan ko’y nawala, at nasabing handa na akong muling masaktan”

It’s very incomprehensible how love works. As stated in this sweet tagalog love quotes , No matter how tragic the past is, once the calling of love returns, it’s simply irresistible. Even if vow, honor and conviction would join up together against love, nah, love will always win, it will always have its way to be on the top of everything.

“Gabundok man ang pagitan natin sa isa’t isa, handa akong lumipad patungo sayo, mapatunayan ko lang na ikaw ang mahal ko at hindi na ito magbabago”

True love perceives no matter how long the distance is and how strong the temptations are, though many find it hard to sustain such relationship, still those who succeed in doing so will be saluted by many. Being away from the one you love means also being open to a lot more doors of temptations to get yourself away from being faithful and loyal to your partner; and being victorious against those is a strong sign that the two of you are meant together, forever.

“Alam mo? Dalawang beses lang naman kita gustong makasama, ngayon at magpakailan pa man”

Nice, this quote has the style of disappointing you in the first place then eventually gives you the sense of joy and satisfaction. Imagine somebody telling you that he or she wanted to be with you in just two moments? That’s disheartening, however, hearing further, knowing its forever, men! will be flattering to death. This also indirectly implies the sense of marriage, being together forever.

“Mahal kita, hindi dahil ikaw ay perpekto. Mahal kita dahil tanggap ko lahat sa’yo, pati mga kasalanan at pagkakamali mo”

, nothing is sweeter than being told by the one you love that he or she loves you despite everything. This is somewhat rare, for today’s generation, love is limited to everything that is positive, so really, knowing that you are accepted is something.

“Pangarap kong malanghap ang aroma mo tuwing pag-gising ko sa umaga, mahawakan ang kamay mo at  mayakap ka sa twina,” the guy said sweetly to his girl.

“Maaaring hindi ikaw ang unang minahal ko, pero mapapanigurado ko na ikaw na ang huling hahawak ng puso ko,” the girl replied as she touched the face of her guy.

“Alam mo, pag masaya ka, masaya rin ako, pag malungkot ka, malungkot rin ako, pag badtip ka, badtrip din ako, pero… kapag lumuha ka, hanep, di ko kaya, magpapakamatay ako,” he stated as he looked at her eye to eye.

“Wag, ang saglit na pagkawalay mo sa piling ko’y tila ikakakabaliw ko na, paano pa kaya kapag tuluyang mawala ka’t hindi na muling makikita?” she pleaded as her eyes began to tear.

Indeed, this is a special ingredient in making your life exciting! That’s why if you really love somebody, give him or her some sweet tagalog love quotes that really come from your heart, for he or she deserves it! If you really mean to say something sincere, sweet tagalog love quotes will always be at their best when composed by someone who’ll offer it wholeheartedly to the one who makes his or her heart beat.

Sweet tagalog love quotes are always in the air. They roam around the mall, the parking areas, the restaurants, everywhere, but they only reside in the hearts of those who truly love. We can find them inside an old wrinkled couple sharing a mug of coffee or even in a three year old boy picking a flower for her girl.

Including this in your everyday love life will make your relationship flow smoothly and leap to the next level. Just try to imagine this sweet situation happening to you while in a date with your “sweetie pie”.

Inspirational Tagalog quotes always help me with coping up. It may be a simple thing but I can dare say that the accumulated inspirational Tagalog quotes that I received from many people over the course of many years has helped me be what I am today. It may not be the main cause, but they can be considered as tiny fragments that completed each and every step that I take.

I know you know the feeling that everything is not working right with you, we all encounter that situation. It is always one thing after another, problems overlapping with each other and you feel that you are sinking, there is no way out, the only direction you’re going is down. It is a hard situation to be in, especially when it is hard for the person to open up about his or her emotions to other people. Somehow, once in awhile, we receive inspirational Tagalog quotes from dear friends, and somehow, the day seems more bearable than yesterday.

It is a wonder how mere combination of words can build hope to other people. Inspirational Tagalog quotes can do that, especially to the girls and boys who feel helpless, lost all motivation in doing something worthwhile with their lives. You can take this string of words, understand what it’s trying to imply and suddenly, you see a light and you tell yourself, that yes, there is hope.

That’s what inspirational Tagalog quotes can do to a person, it may not solve a problem but it gives you a reason to fight, it makes you see that nothing is a lost cause. So whenever I can, I try to send one or two a day to the closest of friends, we never know, maybe they need it.

So my gift to you all, a batch of inspirational Tagalog quotes that I encountered through texts and page comments, and through searching the internet that may help uplift your spirit. Let us all spread the love and care. There is always a person out there who might just be waiting for someone to tell him or her that everything will be alright, that we should always continue to fight for what we believe in.

1. kpg ikaw sad.. and2 lng me, kpg away k nla awy q cla ala me pkialam kng mdmi
   mng kaaway q, bsta alm q ur spcl kya ayw q msktan k.. kc mahal kta eh
2. an angel askd me ‘bkit ka sad?’ thinkng of u i answrd ‘kc mis ko na sya e’..
   den i heard d angel giggle.. i lukd up nd bgan 2 smyl nd sed “_____, kaw
   pla yan’
3. Kala ko dati malas ako.. kala ko pinagtripan ako ng mundo tapos napatingin
   ako sau tpos napangiti.. bkt? Kc kahit gano ako kamalas.. bawing bawi naman
   dhl sau
4. If you feel so sad, lean on my shoulder. If you want to cry, eto panyo. Pero
   pag di mo na kaya, yakap na lang kita. Para feel mo, hindi ka nag-iisa.
   Nandito lang me lagi just 4u!
5. Kapag dumating ang araw na ayaw mo na sakin, sabihin mo lang! Kaya kitang
   pakawalan. Tatanggapin ko kung yun rin lang. Pero sana hayaan mong yakapin
   kita habang sinasabi, “Sakin ka babalik, ha. Pag iniwan ka na niya.”
6. “boys cannot live without girls….but girls can live without boys……..”
7. Practice Mkes PERFECT
   But den again
   NOBoDy’s PERFECT….
   So Why????
   PRACTICE?????”"”"***
8. Lahat ng problema ay may solusyon.  Kapag walang solusyon, wag mo ng problemahin.
9. Always remember na kung kaya ng iba, ipagawa mo sa kanila.
10. Hindi lahat ng gwapo may girlfriend, ang iba sa kanila ay may boyfriend.
11. You wouldn’t know how sweet life could be, unless you’ve tasted somebody.
12. Don’t make the same mistake twice.  Madami pang ibang kasalan, try mo naman yung iba.
13. There’s always tomorrow, kaya magtira ka ng trabaho para bukas.
14. Kapag madami ang hadlang sa landas na gusto mong tahakin, kapag ang lahat ay nakakabangga mo at kumukontra sa’yo! Wag kang makulit, EXIT yan! Dun ka sa ENTRANCE!.
15. Di ako nakialam sa bihay ng iba.. di ako nang-agaw ng taong mahal ng iba.. yung mga bagay na di ko giangawa bakit ako pa rin ang lumalabas na masama? Ganun ba ako kaganda para kainggitan nila?
16. Pag Masaya ka, Masaya din ako… pag badtrip ka, badtrip din ako, pag malungkot ka, malungkot din ako, pag nasasaktan ka, nasasaktan din ako..wala lang… gusto lang kitang gayahin forever, idol kita eh. Hihi.
17. Buhay parang kalsada, mahaba, maraming dumadaan, ako isa lang sa maraming dumaan sa buhay mo at sa haba nito tanggap kong malilimutan mo din ako, pero sanay naging masaya ka sa pagdaan ko..
18. Minsan sa buhay ko may nagawa ako di q namamalayan.. my oras na myabang nap ala aq..nakakainis at nakakasakit nap ala ng ibang tao.. at higit sa lahat lagging ngtataray ng walang dahilan, of ever isa ka sa nsaktan k, sorry ha, d ko sinasadya..
19. Kung lahat ng mgbbgo at lahat li2pas..d q ccrain ang pinagsmhan natin.. pro kung mklimutan mo q.. wla aqng mggwa..bsta aq? Itatago kta sa puso q hnggang sa huling tibok nito..
20. We started as frendz..across d road it almost died but still it survived..smhow, somway it juz kips on finding its way.

There is nothing like ending the day knowing that one inspirational Tagalog quote can help a friend. The unity of it, the level of understanding brings people together, it tells you that someone out there really do understand what you are going through. That is why you should be more positive and caring, treasure the people surrounding you, they may be needing of our support, and we can do it the simplest way we can easily do. Send an inspirational Tagalog quote, a single one or more would not hurt. But to all of you, the best way we can really motivate a person is by understanding, so let us be more considerate to others and let us not forget ourselves that a person will only be down if he or she decides to be down. I know for sure, that we can always keep getting up and that will define you as a person.

Tagalog Love Quotes, hmmm. I just got one, I think somebody likes me!

I know you know the feeling ladies and gentlemen, the anticipation, that crazy yet subtle excitement when your cell phone beeps after sending some sweet Tagalog love quotes to that cutie next door. The pressure, the combination of warm and cool sensations engulfing your face, you take one last breath and face the inevitable resolution if a person likes you or not. Will you get a sweet Tagalog love quote in reply? Or the ever so frustrating “hu u?”

Yes I have been there and done that loads of times. I cannot even count the subtle rejections that I got, but I will never forget each and every nice and sweet Tagalog love quotes that I get in return. It is the moment that you want to contain yourself and act all cool, but your heart is shouting, thumping, trying to kick out of your rib cage, and you handle your enthusiasm the best way you know how. You keep quiet, and wear a smug smile for the rest of the day. But there is this lurking feeling, an inch of black blob, a speck of dirt in a brightly lit white room, then the question pops up, Am I assuming too soon?

Now here’s the dilemma, some people are just too polite if you send some sweet Tagalog love quotes, so they just send some in return. But how will we know if those three messages, all sweet Tagalog love quotes that you kept in your inbox really does mean something? I am not a connoisseur of sweet Tagalog love quotes, or any other quotes in particular, but here is an advice, spend time with the person, never depend on messages, especially pre-made once. It is simpler and clearer especially when you are in the critical stage of getting the nod from your crush. But if personally spending time together is not possible at the moment, yes you can trade some sweetie pie mushy quotes all you want, as long as you are not forgetting to converse like human beings, remember, people are not cute little puppies.

Here are some examples and feel free to send some, or all, but I would not recommend that.

1. Nang aking bilangin ang mga bituin, ay naku, mas marami pa rin ang kinang at ligayang hatid ng text mo sa akin.
2. Hindi ba nangangalay ang iyong mga kamay?  Bakit kamo? Dahil sa katatambol mo sa puso ko.
3. Ang tanong ko, dapat ba akong magmahal?  Ang sagot mo, dapat ka bang mahalin?  Kaya dapat lamang, tayo ay magmahalan.
4. Ang ganda ng umaga because of you. Ang ganda ng dream ko, it was all about you. Ang sakit ng ulo ko, puro you na lang ng you. Sabi ni doc, maybe because I miss you.
5. Press down if you miss me. Talaga? Sweet mo naman. You really miss me huh? Still pressing down. Impressed na ako, ha? Sobrang miss na yan. Well, I miss you too.
6. Minsan caring is better than loving. Minsan tea is better than coffee. Minsan smile is better than laughter. Pero nobody is better than you.
7. Some people choose friends who are thoughtful n caring. Some prefer those who r smart n good looking. When u choose me, pinakyaw mo na lahat.
8. D only people whom I greet “Good morning” r those who r smart, cute n malakas ang sex appeal. So, pano ba yan, e di Good afternoon na lang sayo!
9. Smile is the secret to stay young and cute. Naks, bakit ka nakangiti?
10. People are always looking for cute ones, the perfect ones, the gorgeous ones, the smart ones, the sweet ones. Lagi na lang ako! Ako! Ako!
11. How to spot a texter? 1. may muscle ang thumb 2. barok magsalita 3. may bangga ang auto 4. lagging nakayuko 5. nakasimangot dahil walang nagti text.
12. I’m thinking of u. I want to be with u. I am longing for u. I have a crush on u. I want to hug and kiss u. I love u. Ikaw, love mo rin ba ang letter u?
13. Kung akala mo importante ka sa akin, kung akala mo may tiwala ako sayo, kung akalamo namimiss kita at kung akala mo friend kita…Korek ka dyan!
14. If you save this message, it means cute ako. If you edit it, cute pa rin ako. If you delete it, naiinggit ka kasi cute ako. Pero kung ipoforward mo, pinagkakalat mong cute ako.
15. Smile is the secret to stay young and cute. Naks, bakit ka nakangiti?
16. I looked at d sky, d sky is beautiful. I looked at you…..I looked at d sky na lang ulit. Gud A.M.
17. Gusto ko na benta cell phone ko… lam mo ba? Gusto ko hagis, durugin at tadyakan ang cell phone ko… lam mo ba? Gusto ko na panakaw to… lam mo ba? Maloloka na ko sa pag-iintay ng text mo… lam mo ba?
18. Kahit ilang beses pa akong masaktan dahil sayo, di kita iiwan, di ako susuko.Dahil kung may 100 dahilan para iwan ka, hahanap pa rin ako ng isang dahilanpara ipaglaban ka.
19. Sabi naman sayo, eh. Wag kang maging sweet, wag kang maglambing. Tingnan motuloy ngayon. Kasalanan mo to, eh! Masasaktan na naman ako kasi mahal nakita, eh. Mahal na mahal.
20. Nagulat aq 1 araw.. nnjan xa sa tbi co.. halos araw2 xa kasama q.. sb q n.. m22pad dn
    pangarap q.. pro ng mrrmdaman q ng mhal nya q… sb nya, “uy tnx ha? npgselos din natin mahal q”

There, I tried to gather some sweet Tagalog love quotes that may interest you, or even brighten up your day. Some of them are marching around the internet, some came from my ‘lovey-doods’. I would not tell which ones exactly, you might think I am such a mushy person. Well, I won’t deny, these messages really did make me smile, so feel free to use some of them, and remember, be careful who you send it to, you would not want to send sweet Tagalog love quotes to the crazy pervert in the other room.  Isn’t it nice? Wholesome messages for the people who mean something to us, or in many cases, they mean everything. Simply grouped words, containing so much meaning, and so much care to the people we love. If the world can revolve around the sweetness that covers these quotes, I will be proud to be considered as mushy.